One Year On - Side A

On the 18th April 2017, Theresa May annouced a snap General Election.
On the 18th April 2017, I, like many others, joined the Liberal Democrats.

It was not an easy decision for me, and it is one I still struggle with in ways, but I was fed up with constant slide of the society and the world further and further from the kind of place I wanted to live in, and again like many others, Theresa May's obvious attempt to game the UK political system proved the last straw in making me go "no goddammit, I've had enough."
As Cameron in Ferris Bueller's Day Off said - I am not going to sit here on my ass as the events that affect me unfold to determine the course of my life.  I am going to take a stand.

A year on seems a suitable time to reflect on my experience so far, what it's brought me, what I've learned and why I keep coming back.

It took me about a month to really do anything after joining, mostly due to work, but one day, I turned up to the local Southwark Campaign office, told them I had a couple of days spare, and was put to work in the time-honoured, stripe-earning traditions, of delivering leaftets, stuffing envelopes, sorting into walks etc.
I did say I only had a couple of days spare.  Fast forward over the next few weeks and I'm juggling keys to 2 different campaign offices, driving print runs across London at 4am, becoming acutely familiar with how to troubleshoot RISO paperjams, and generally spending almost every free second I have outside of work helping out in one way or another.  At one point, I was even accused of enjoying myself!

Come Polling Day in June, I had become enough of a regular I was in charge of a polling district, despite never having really campaigned properly before, never door knocked, never used MiniVAN, and it being my first election, but my enthusiasm and commitment had been noted and was being encouraged as aggressively as the local party could without scaring me off.
It was a hell of a learning experience.
It took me reasonably far outside my comfort zone and stuck me there for 18 hours straight, and having to lead and guide others whilst doing it.  There are of course, things I would do differently, or just better next time, now I have a good deal more experience under my belt.  I still absolutely hate Telling and the entire prospect of Telling (I still have no idea why it's called that?) is almost enough to put me off the idea of helping out on polling days altogether.  But clearly, something felt right for me about the whole thing, because I've now spent the year following helping to campaign for the person who was in charge of me on Polling Day, and who is now standing as a councillor in the local elections this year (and I should add, it was also her first time campaigning in 2017, how far we've come!)

Roll on September and I manage to luck out with a last minute leave request at work to go to my first Lib Dem Conference - I'm immensely helped by the 'first timer' rate, allowing me to sign up at the last minute for virtually nothing, and the fact that a long standing lib dem friend has a spare bed in his room I can crash in.
I go worried that I won't know anyone/be brave enough to speak to them, will get irritated and frustrated at the general idiocy of people when they tend to gather in large groups, and feeling somewhat fragile for personal reasons at the time too.
I end up at a dinner with 20 people I realise I know most of by the second night, desperately wishing I had more time in my day to attend more sessions, and in my socks at 3am in the hotel bar the night of glee club (in my defence, everyone had abandoned the concept of shoes by that point).  I've already got my hotel booked for Brighton later this year.

I go to London Regional Conference, have some nerdy data discussions (thanks @BaronDenise!), find out I enjoy, and just 'get' compliance far too much for a generally sane person (*cough* GDPR *cough*), and am once again struck by how many faces I recognise in and around the place, and how many greet me pleased to see I keep coming back.

The past year I've been out campaigning once again in Southwark - it's not my local consituency, or ward, but it is the place where I can help make a difference.  I haven't been out as much as I'd like in some ways, but I've been out usually at least once each month.  As we get closer to the local elections on May 3rd I'm out more and more, and I already have Polling Day booked off work (and the day following to recover!)  Whilst I know there are others out there helping, it's odd in some ways that until April I had only ever really been out with just myself and the actual candidates since September - getting people out when there isn't the impetus of a General Election is hard.
But having been out enough times, I find I recognise the streets, the estates and the blocks of flats, I recognise names and know which places are hard to get into, which voters are sympathetic to the Lib Dem outlook, our local talking points and key messages are becoming second nature to me.

It's been a learning experience for me the entire year.  As anyone with any kind of anxiety will understand all too well, the shift that has had to take place in me internally in order to be able to go knock on 100 stranger's doors in an evenin, or buzz each and every door bell on entire blocks of flats, and cheerily speak to as many answer and try and coax quite personal information about their political views out of them is, well, utterly surreal for me.
I of course put a 'game face' on.  Well, a campaign face, I suppose, it's a specific context that's made it easier for me to learn to do it before I have time to let myself worry about it, and it's not a skill that has made the transition to other aspects of my work or social life.  But from where I've started, it's a huge step for my own personal growth.
Now, the concept of delivery leaflets being 'scary' seems ridiculous to me.  It's just a load of mailboxes.  Even for the builds you have to get buzzed into, I've learnt my tricks-of-the-trade on how to get let in via a 10 second intercom chat now and I can blitz my way through a delivery round.

Things that I've learnt over the last year:

• Firstly, one of the best bits of advice I've ever heard that is just generally worth thinking about in life, which came from Autumn 2017 Conference's 'Dealing with Difficult People' session: We read emails like a letter, but we write them like a note - when we write an email, it is quick, with often little thought to format, layout, phrasing, etc.  When we read one from someone, we assume they've spent considerable time writing it, and chosen their town carefully, much like you would with a letter.  A lot of misunderstanding and miscommunication comes from the difference between the two
• As a newbie, go to as many training sessions as you can.  They help.
• Knock on the door before you have a chance to set your anxiety kick in
• Everyone is volunteering and giving their time freely, they'll always try and squeeze just a few more doors out of you, but no one will criticize you when you need to go, even if you got their later, we all have lives.
• When the ink drum in a RISO bursts, don't end up being the guy that fixes that unless you have a change of clothes.
• People, in London certainly, are REALLY NICE on the doors, much to my surprise.  There's the odd aggressively slammed door in your face - I'd probably do the same to a UKIP canvasser if they ever tried it on me, but most people understand you're a volunteer, or just trying to do your best for the world, even if they disagree with you.  Even if they're juggling 3 screaming kids and a growling dog and trying to do the dinner at the time you press the doorbell, they just say, sorry it's a bad time, and you have a chance to politely say sorry to disturb you, have a good evening.  
• Being polite back pays dividends, if someone is busy, leave them in peace.  They will always remember which party the pushy campaigner who insists on trying to speak to them was from - negatively so.
• Showing people how to canvass is much better than telling them.  After a few doors they'll get the idea and usually start speaking to voters themselves.
• About 26 million different tactics for getting the nice lady in flat 34 to buzz you in so you can canvass the entire block.
• The envelope stuffing machine never works.

Things that have helped this:

• Experienced members immediately sharing their knowledge with me so I could help the campaign more - even something as trivial as where is usually the best line of text to tri-fold your A4 letter up to so it fits in the envelope nicely.
• Members explaining the purpose of internal campaign office admin - understanding how my little repetitive actions helped us target and reach voters and how it fed into what other campaigners were doing meant that you had a sense that you were doing something, you felt politicallly active and involved, even if you were just sticking labels on coloured envelopes.
• People being pretty decent about you knocking on all their doors like an annoying double glazing salesman actually makes it a lot easier to get over the nerves and anxiety, thanks People!
• Being rapidly recognised as capable and enthusastic, and being encouraged as much as possible by other members.
• People taking risks, and trusting and encouraging that enthuiasm by giving you responsibility early on.
• From Conference - everyone is keen to hear from the new members, who they are, how they became a lib dem, what they've done, what they want to do, what they think; whether they're 18 or 77 every new member is encouraged to speak up as much as possible
• ALDC - I joined on the recommendation of a friend.  Their resources are fantastic for anyone who wants to learn more about how to be a better campaigner, and what campaigining is effective.  Definitely worth the membership dues.
• Getting out there as often as I can - eveyrone says it, and eveyrone's right.  There is no substitiute for being out in the field, actively talking to voters, seeing how other campaigners do it, what the pros & cons are of different letterboxes (ow fingers!), door entry systems, miniVAN, learning your local area and what resonates with people.  GET OUT THERE.

I will continue to be out campaigning in Southwark over the next few weeks, I will be out on Polling Day trying to get voters out there and ensure they use their votes.
I will be going to Brighton Conference, and dragging a friend with me, for whom it will be his first time (I'd warn him about Glee Club, but honestly, nothing really prepares you for that)
I still really really want to get more involved with the data side of how we understand our voters and what makes for effective campaigining, to learn how to use Connect, and am continuously hampered in this by my a) lack of free time and b) a seemingly general lack of inroads to anything other than on-the-door campaigining (admittedly, I was invited to a Lib Dem hackday this weekend and would LOVE to go and discuss R with them cause everyone loves pretty graphs with great coding behind them, but alas it is postal vote weekend and I'm really needed out campaigning)
I have gone in for the Lib Dems hook, line and sinker; I don't regret it, it's probably one of the better decisions I've made in life, and there is still so much I would like to get involved with.


As a final note:
Two of my friends, long standing and well-known Lib Dems recently got a dog.  Their first ever.  A rescue animal. I grew up with several rescue animals, and had a dog for 10 years; I'm used to them, and can read their mannerisms quite well.  It's slightly odd that as I'm watching my friends 'learn' how to own a dog, and rolling my eyes at things that seem so obvious to me but aren't your first time around, they are no doubt finding no small amount of amusement in watching me discover my internal Lib Dem campaigner, something they have both done for years.  Life is funny sometimes.

Hook, line, and sinker

Today was my first day back at work, after my first Party Conference and oh boy do I have the post Conference blues.

I registered for Conference pretty last minute, other personal commitments having not been settled till quite late - I did at least manage to just avoid having to go to what was clearly going to be the Room of Shame and pick up my pass on arrival, it instead arriving by mail a few days beforehand.

A friend of mine who is a long standing Lib Dem was attending and was able to offer me a spare bed in his already booked hotel room on such short notice, which helped to keep costs down, and gave me a solid base, along with easy introductions to some people to find my bearings. I downloaded the app and started adding things to my personal schedule on the train down.

I was somewhat nervous about attending, being able to only think of 3 people who I might know already going, on top of long standing social anxiety and mental health concerns and so my ability to talk to people and make friends amongst a large group of strangers was a little under question.  Conference was a thing I knew I was either going to love, or hate, and there was only one way to find out.

Dear Conference, I should not have been worried. 
I went from sitting with my friend and a few people he knew on the first night to the next night eating at a comically long table with 20 people from my local party and dancing/singing like an idiot at Communi-oke till 1am. 
Within 24 hours I was experiencing the common problem of it taking 15 minutes to walk even between rooms next door as you bumped into so many people you knew - I can't imagine what it must be like after 20 years of this.

In fact, as with everything I have done with the Lib Dems to date, I LOVED every moment of it.  From my first policy vote and the feeling of true engagement with the party process, to fascinating talks and speeches with party luminaries, excellent and focussed training that was designed superbly given the massive influx of new members & attendees who are eager but inexperienced, and of course, the many many drinks receptions.  And just as you're told as new member, if you go up to stranger and start a conversation, they will be delighted to talk to you - it really is true!

One day, no doubt, I will meet some quarrelsome figure within the party and come across things I really dislike (although I did go to the excellent training session on 'Dealing with Difficult People' which got across some useful techniques for dealing with conflict in all areas of life, not just Party matters), but for now, the impression the Liberal Democrats have made on me is impeccable and a credit to the Party's values.

I have fallen hook, line, and sinker for my new found politicsm and involvement with the Liberal Democrats and if I didn't know it before, Conference has definitely proved it to me.  I've come away with a host of new contacts, new motivation to get even more involved, and I'm already looking forward to when I can register for my next Conference.

By then I might just have got over the shock of what exactly I walked into at 'Glee Club'...

This Conference thing..

So I keep getting emails about this Conference thing...

I guess it's what you do as a Lib Dem?

Honestly, I don't know that much detail, and it could be the sort of thing I love or hate.  I get the impression it's that for a lot of people, and no reflection on my specific personality.

But I am interested to learn more about the party, about how it operates, to see that in action and understand what I can get involved in and how.  That information isn't exactly easily findable.  It's either provided with barely a passing reference to federal structure and precious little that might actually be informative (*cough* welcome pack *cough*), or else comes in an over burdensome format that whilst probably somewhat of a useful reference to old hands, is far too convoluted and poorly indexed for a newcomer to navigate (depths of the LD website).

Conference seemed like a good, deep-end jump into getting to grips with all this.  I'm frustrated by my ability to not do more - I still get stuff from the local party in the wake of the General Election, but the tricky element for me is finding what I can fit around my excessively demanding work schedule. 

Pleasingly, as a first time attendee, the rate is to come is heavily discounted and doesn't suffer from any early bird period - I can make my decision whensoever I choose. 

For now, the holiday request from work is in, and I'm awaiting the next payday to pay my registration fee.  I'm definitely curious, and if nothing else this feels like the sort of thing I should attend the once, so I can understand what exactly happens there, even if it proves not to be my cup of tea.

Fear and Hope

So the big day is tomorrow (today now).  It's called a snap election and I've definitely felt the breakneck speed of it is.

From a couple of hours one afternoon delivering leaflets, to managing large complex print runs of campaign material, finding myself with the keys to not just one but two campaign offices in my pocket late one night and now tomorrow I've been elevated to the lofty heights of captain of a polling district.

It's been utterly crazy.  And enjoyable.  Even coming from an industry which is habitually last minute, endlessly changing, high risk and demanding many late hours, from my tiny corner of perspective I've felt this election you ramp up.

I gave more than I was expecting to, and I got back more than I anticipated.  Tomorrow is, on a personal level, terrifying in many ways.  It's placing me reasonably far out of my comfort zone, and for a pretty decent period of time.  But because people have recognised my enthusiasm and my capability, because I've been able to find worth in my contributions, I've allowed myself to get swept up by the torrent of energy this campaign has demanded and I'm willing to rise to the challenge.

On a selfish level, it will hopefully help me to work on problems I've been trying to fix for a long time.  But that's not why I agreed to it.  I'm doing it because I believe in the campaign - in what the Lib Dems are fighting for and what they represent.

I am fighting with all my heart tomorrow because I genuinely believe in what I'm doing, and the passion I've found in everyone else I've been around the last few weeks has just further cemented my own passion for it too.  I hope the Lib Dems do well, I hope Simon Hughes gets elected because it would be the best reward for all the effort I've put in, but if he doesn't I won't regret it.

I will continue to fight, and I have found people who will fight alongside me.  And if you're in the district I'm captaining tomorrow, you better vote early, or I'll be knocking on your door non-stop till you do!

Overcoming betrayal

I couldn't have decided to join the Liberal Democrats without revisiting, and reconciling with myself the problematic sense of betrayals that many people of my generation felt came from the 2010 General Election and resulting coalition.

All the way back in 1997, when I was just hitting adolescence at school there was a similar sentiment to the one that seemed to be driving things in the run up to 2010.  A generation was frustrated with decades of the old then Thatcherite/Major Conservative government; a government of the past they felt no longer represented them, and on the wave of that came the shiny promise of New Labour.
They'll regret it, my parents said, lifelong fiscally Conservative voters.  Labour governments are always a disaster. ("Eventually you run out of other people's money.")
But this was New Labour.  A Labour that promised none of that previous incompetence.  Charismatic (a very novel idea to the Thatcher/Major crowd) and keyed into an increasingly global and conscientious electorate.  If I could have voted then I'd have voted Labour of course.
And we got Blair.  I perhaps began to then the dangers of the populist choice promising new ivory towered housing for all and free rose tinted glasses through the NHS.

Fast forward 12 years and again, with a new stock of voters, people had grown tiresome and indeed hostile of the actions of the Blair years.  Disillusioned Labour voters were sensible enough not to completely flip, and the new millenial of which I was a part had an affinity with 1960s socialism (aptly reflected in a strong shift to human interest news coverage and fly on the wall style documentaries).  Why not give the Lib Dems a shot?  They've been out on the side lines for a good line while now, surely they can't be any worse than what we've had?
Of course back in those heady days the political centre hadn't lurched as far to the right yet and the Lib Dems comfortably occupied the centre left just as much as Labour did with the inevitable fringe elements in both directions.

The initial results of the 2010 General Election prove fascinating, reflective and indicative of the future problems to come in so many ways I could probably get 3 posts out of talking about them before I even needed to do any external reading on the subject.  But like many, I voted Lib Dem, hoping for them to win, and if not, that a left wing coalition of LD/Lab would result. 

We ended up with the Con/LD coalition, which was very much NOT what so many of us had voted for. 
Hindsight is of course, 20-20, and I can see now that given the numbers, a LD/Lab minority government would have all kinds of issues.  Given the increasing partisanship running rife through Western democracies I'm sure the conservatives would have to a certain extent dug in and been intransigent for the sake of it.
I'm also now blessed with the insight and understanding of how the Liberal Democrats softened Conservative policies; where they forced compromise, a better knowledge of what they were responsible for, and critically what was unfairly blamed on them.

But these are not insights that can easily be imparted to the general populace; they are not obvious, and they are not quick to communicate; it's taken me the better part of 3 years to come to know them.  And whilst I have learnt to accept them not everyone may be so forgiving.

This Election I find myself plagued by friends, who regularly say 'well I would vote lib dem, but look what they did last time'.  The coalition and tuition fees are the most cited reasons, and they are cute often.
I now have some of the answers to why these were necessary, or at least felt the best course of action.  But they are not quick answers.  They are not satisfying answers.  I still understand my friends' sense of betrayal.  And no answer I can give them will remove that, or has the ability to assure them such decisions wouldn't be taken in future.

I still think the Lib Dems made grave mistakes on these and other issues.  Politics is always about compromise, but I still firmly believe these were the wrong ones to make.  They were the bottom lines.  And dear gods are they paying for it.
But I didn't join the Liberal Democrats to fix this election.  I didn't join them because I think next time around I could help avoid such folly.  I joined them, because Brexit, Trump, this Election, are about the kind of society we want to be, about the kind of world we want to live in and how we wish to approach those around us.
I became a Lib Dem because I believe they represent one of the best and strongest hopes for the kind of views I have on those subjects, and I think it's more important than ever for those people to be visible. It's why I've gone from rarely posting anything UK politics related on my social media feeds to yelling from the mountaintops about my involvement.
This fight, my fight is for the long haul.  And I'm lucky in joining a party whose members very rarely agree on the best course of action, but routinely turn up and fight for what's important.

Empty Chairs at Empty Pedestals

It has been announced that Amber Rudd is to represent the conservatives at the next televised debate.

I grew up with a lot of Americanisms - smores, school prom, the idea that summer starts in may and ends in September.  I grew up with an ingrained knowledge that live debates were a key part of the electoral process.  The chance for voters on a massive scale to engage with the candidates who will potentially lead their country, and see how they respond on the spot against each other and the public.

To me, it is unconscionable, and bluntly, insulting, that Theresa May refuses to engage with this process in full in the UK.

Televised election debates are a new concept in the UK - very much an import from the US system.  And it's important to note the systems have differences.  We don't vote for a leader here per se, we vote for local party candidates and thereby decide which party, and which leader the country will have; because the UK doesn't isolate it's Executive from the Legislature, there are frequent opportunities for the 'losing candidate(s)’ to hold the winner to account in the form of PMQs; we are a country fiercely proud of it's Parliamentary system with good reason, and we are inherently against creeping Americanisation as a society and nation.

But from its inception in the UK, live televised election debates have been a success - viewing figures show they do engage with a huge number of voters, importantly, they engage with a lot of younger voters, the IT generation, where political apathy is otherwise rife.  Up to 40% of voters consider televised debates to have directly influenced their polling day decision.
And political parties, given the chance, have taken part in them, fielding their leaders, hopeful future PMs, to represent why they and their party are the best hope for our futures.  Whatever their misgivings, the parties have understood the importance and potential of these kinds of events from day one.

That May refuses to meet with the voters in this kind of public forum is utterly unacceptable to me.  It is the sort of thing that would lead me to consider a politician unfit to lead their party.  It speaks of such a flagrant disregard to engage with votes, to defend one's political views and principles under pressure.  At worst it reveals a known inability to do so but a blind refusal to acknowledge that shortcoming.

Election debates aren't perfect.  They're slightly artificial with their prearranged topics and rules and candidate preparation, but they inevitably have those uncontrolled moments and unpredictable developments of arguement that can be found telling of a person, and fundamentally, regardless of the local vote being for local candidates and parties, election campaigns have ALWAYS revolved around the personalities of the leaders.  They are the representative of the party, and they are the face of the party; they should be expected to defend the parties policies in national campaigns, and parties across the whole spectrum should be entitled to take part if we are to call ourselves fair democracies.
(I recognise situations like the 2016 US Election prove the problem of that latter point where you can end up with a field that is too large to practically manage a debate with, but that is not a reason to abandon the process in entirety.  Throw the bathwater.  Keep the baby etc.)

We poll locally, but we vote nationally.  Candidates face hustings locally, why should party leaders be expected any lesser of on the national stage, from both the electorate, and their own parties.

Theresa May's absence is inexcusable.  The lack of a comprehensive party leader debate is unacceptable, and where party leaders do not participate in them, they should damned well be empty chaired.

Catching the bug

I've had a few days off and so, glutton for punishment that I am, instead of spending them watching daytime tv and gorging on chocolate ice cream, I decided to head into the Southwark Liberal Democrat Campaign office and see if I could help out.

It was helped a little by the fact I had a doctor's appointment Thursday morning.  Being already up and about it was easy to get off 2 stops early on my way home.

First impressions were how busy it was for a weekday around 1130.  A full big table of volunteers was already deep into stuffing envelopes - my first task of the day to pitch in on whilst they found a fuller task they could set me to (I'd conceded on arrival I could help all day so they knew they had several hours of my time).

Experienced members helped show me the best places and lines to fold the leaflets along - an art clearly honed thousands and thousands of leaflets and envelopes.

Shortly thereafter it was onto organising the stacks of stuffed letter into a coded order and then grouping by delivery office ready to send out in the freepost.

Good credit is due to the team at the office that day, who took the time to explain not just what they needed me to do, but what it was for, what would happen next, how everything fed into the larger picture, what the campaigning aim of each task was.  It was hugely helpful to me as someone who wants to learn more about the entire process and become more involved in it, but I also think an understanding of context helps people work out what to do generally - understanding that the reason everything has to stay in coded order is because that corresponds to the walks that volunteers are then sent out to deliver. 

Having delivered a little here, and also up in the Sleaford by election, I also understand that roads don't often go in number order; you want all the evens together and all the odds together because that's how the road is laid out when you walk it - unless it's a cul-de-sac, in which case it does go in number order, or an estate or block of flats, which might have any variety of arbitrary ordering schemes.  I massively appreciated everyone who took the time to not just explain the single task, but its importance, the best ways to do it, and how it ultimately helped us target and reach voters.

Owing to the fact it was a weekday that I randomly had off, I was the only young volunteer in the office, I was inevitably asked the question all young people are asked these days - 'Do you know how to work the technology?'
First it was the Apple TV, then a printer jam.
They clearly realised I'd found my element.

Before long I was delegated a task of overseeing a print run of 40000+ letters - managing multiple printers, clearing jams,  grabbing materials from a store room, sorting paper, always keeping everything in number order as it comes off and remerging it all as the multiple printers finished.  Soon they added another print job of a different sort and I was learning all kinds of repographics things.
At one point, manically running back and forth with my 3rd set of print trays, sorting boxes and scribbled on paper label dividers I was even accused of looking like I was enjoying myself!

Okay so it's a bit of a weird thing enjoy - in honestly it was very similar to my day job so was an easy task for me.  But the enjoyment came from the feeling of engagement and involvement.  Of the growing sense that I wasn't just sitting around wondering why the world is become a darker place - I was doing my small, rather arcane but useful part in fighting against that and standing up for the kind of world I'd like to live in, the kind of society I'd like to be a part of.

Being in the campaign office gave me a great opportunity to see and learn some of the many different cogs that feed into an election campaign, overhearing campaign gossip, learning he experiences of those who are hardened pros. 
From intending to go in for half a day, I ended up going staying till 8pm, going back the next day for another 10 hours, and getting up early on Sunday to do another 3.5 hours because I wanted to see the job done personally.  That all happened because people took the time to encourage me, to recognise my enthusiasm, to take the time to explain context and train me up on new processes and equipment right from the start.

I left with a request to email across my availability until polling day, and mentally revising my diary to find some additional days to go do my part.